Do you want to know the secret of happiness? The answer to this is very simple and Osho gives the best answer to this. Osho says, “the secret to be happy is not to be unhappy.” If you think deep, you will understand that what Osho said is not only obvious and simple but also greater in meaning. What this means is that “being happy” is a choice. A conscious choice of “not to be unhappy.” You have the power and control to choose wisely and be happy. So to understand happiness, you need to understand unhappiness. If you understand what brings unhappiness, you can choose wisely to be happy. There are two things which will 100% make you unhappy with no exception and if you are able to understand these two things and accept it, you will be happy and trust me it is simple.
Here you go, number one way… “if you expect everybody to be happy with you.” I mean practically you can’t make everybody like you and be happy with what you do. We are all unique with different tastes and different outlooks towards life, then how is it possible to expect everybody to be happy with you. Simple example, if you support your wife, your mom may not like it and if you support your mom, your wife may not like it. You can’t expect both of them to be happy with you by supporting one of them. You have to make a choice based on the situation. Even Jesus, son of god was not able to make everybody happy and he ended up getting crucified. If god can’t do it, you can’t. So don’t expect everybody to be happy with you. Once you understand this then you will not be bothered if some people are not happy with you.
Second way of unhappiness…”if you expect yourself to make everybody happy.” This is dangerous, if you do this then everybody will be happy, expect you. You can’t make everybody happy and this will make you lose your identity and self. You keep changing your character and likes and dislikes to the needs of others so that you can make them happy. You keep compromising to make others happy and in turn you remain unhappy. You want to go to an English movie and your friend wants to go to a Hindi movie and just to make your friend happy, you agree to go to the Hindi movie. You go and sit in the movie for 2 hours and you don’t understand or enjoy even one word. You choose to be unhappy to make your friend happy. You want to take rest at home and your wife wants to go shopping and you choose to remain happy by agreeing to go out for shopping with her just to make her happy. You have made your life a series of compromises. Understand, there is only one life and you need to do what makes you happy. If you understand that you can’t make everybody happy, you will be happy. By saying ‘yes’ to everybody, make sure that you don’t say ‘no’ to you.
The secret of happiness is:
1. Don’t expect everybody to be happy with you.
2. Don’t try to make everybody happy.
Live life happily by not being unhappy.